Have you ever asked:
Will I ever meet my perfect
match? Why do I seem to be the
only person not in a
relationship? Why does it always
seem like so much hard work to
meet my perfect match? How can I
be so successful in other areas
of my life but lousy in
relationships? Why is it so hard
to approach men/women who I
like. Should I believe married
friends who say, it will happen
when I least expect it to?
Many of us ask these questions.
I was single for on and off
thirteen years and these
questions frequently went around
in my head.
Here are my top tips on taking
action and massively increasing
your chances of meeting your
perfect match:
1. Let Go of the Past. Holding
on to the past too tightly can
prevent you from getting what
you want out of present
relationships.
Over-romanticising about a past
relationship, which you ended
and now regret, is a sure fire
way to stay single or to become
trapped in a pattern of
short-lived, dead-end
relationships. Instead of seeing
past relationships through
rose-tinted glasses, see them
for what they were and remember
that you ended them for a reason.
When you have been badly hurt,
it can be hard to let go of
resentment and to trust again.
Exercising forgiveness is
essential so that you enter new
relationships with positive
energy.
2. Remember That You Deserve the
Best. One simple question, "What
do I deserve out of a
relationship?" can help you
understand why you keep
attracting Mr. or Mrs. Wrong. If
we don't admit to ourselves and
communicate what we deserve, how
can we expect others to
reciprocate? Ask yourself what
you deserve, note your answers
and communicate this to
potential partners.
3. Learn to Love Rejection.
Rejection is hardest to handle
when we take it personally.
Remember that anyone rejecting
you after one or two dates
cannot reject YOU as a person.
This is because they have not
got to know the whole picture.
When we are looking for a new
job, we seldom limit the amount
of CV's we send out or the
number of interviews we go to,
just because we get rejected for
one or two jobs. The same
principle applies to meeting
your perfect match, you have to
kiss some frogs along the away.
After all, each frog is bringing
you closer to your prince or
princess.
4. Stop Making Excuses. There
are hundreds of excuses, which
we use to justify why we're
single. These excuses stop you
from meeting "the one" because
they become self-fulfilling
prophecies. Widely used excuses
include:
I need to lose a few pounds
before I start dating again."
"All the decent guys are either
gay or taken." "All the guys my
age want to be with younger
women."I need to get to know
myself before I get involved
with anyone else."."
Your energy is better spent
letting go of the excuses and
getting out there and doing
something different.
5. Don't Expect Your Perfect
Match to Come Knocking On Your
Door. Knights in shiny armour
and glamorous babes don't come
knocking at your door while
you're chilling out watching TV.
You need to get out there and
grab opportunities to meet
potentials.
Remember that if you carry on
doing the same things, you'll
get the same results, i.e. stay
single.
We are lucky to live in an age
of infinite dating options from
internet and speed dating to
taking up new interests, singles
holidays, dance classes and
blind dates organised by
friends. If there's a dating
option you haven't tried, go
ahead and give it a go. That
special someone could be hanging
out in the least expected place!
After many hard years of single
life and meeting my now husband
and after coaching many clients
who thought they would never
meet anyone and did; I believe
that there is a perfect match
out there for everyone. Good
luck in your search!
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